New blog

Hey.
Pssssst.
Follow the link for my new, super totally not-well built yet blog.
Yay!

Suicidal marketing

I used to be a great fan of SG - after all I have a thing for pin-up aesthetic, Petty Page, corsets, gothic fashion, piercing and the like. I discovered the site back in 2003 (2004?) and at the beginning it was a very-underground mouvement. A couple of dozens girls were posting pictures and the effort to make it a female, sex-positive environment was clear. My doubts began to grow when Nerve.com (another site I did read religiously, and still somehow regard as a sex-positive, edgy community) started to aggresively promote Suicide Girls (the models, not the site) as a brand. Today I stumbled upon this:

"Alterna-chick apologists for SG-style pornulation (...) point to the website’s purported (and invisible) “female-positive” stance as evidence that Suicide Girls models are not exploited like conventional Penthousian objets de smutte. Naturally, there are ex-Suicide Girls who, noting that the site re-pimps their photos to hardcore sites as they decline in popularity with the SG staff, and that subscribers to the decidedly un-feminist Playboy have free access to SG, see things rather differently."

Absolutely disapointing, not to mention downright exploitive. In many ways SG's downfall reminds me of American Apparel (1) and the like: companies and sites that truly aimed for the best, but truly got lost along the way.

SG? I'll switch to Fatal Beauty for this kind of imagery instead.

(1) AA and unions.

Valentine Day : get fucked or die trying pt 2.

I am not sure what is going to happen this year, but last year Valentine's "Adbusted" project was a complete success: One year ago with Boris.

I must say I enjoyed this (somehow anti vday) post: I fall down you get up not a sound between us.

For more academic reads I enjoyed this #, as well as Danah Boyd's take on "gifts".

I love sex education

Meanwhile, on planet earth

While I am off learning some web authoring lessons, you might be entertained by my flickR account (sorry Buzznet).

Eep! I'll be back as soon as I can (when I can finally design a blog correctly).

.

Your 'Do You Want the Terrorists to Win' Score: 96%

You are a terrorist-loving, Bush-bashing, "blame America first"-crowd traitor. You are in league with evil-doers who hate our freedoms. By all counts you are a liberal, and as such cleary desire the terrorists to succeed and impose their harsh theocratic restrictions on us all. You are fit to be hung for treason! Luckily George Bush is tapping your internet connection and is now aware of your thought-crime. Have a nice day.... in Guantanamo!

Do You Want the Terrorists to Win?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Gone fishing.

If birthdays are a way the secretly evaluate how many people actually remember you and/or make some effort and send you a note and/or an email, then today only three persons thought about me: my husband, and three Micepace friends. Granted, it is only 11.38 - but I'm probably going to sulk if Geoffrey, Costa and Boris do not send me an email before 6.

/ vapid.

I have a terrible birthday history, from having Bush re-elected two years ago when I was in Vancouver to going and see an awful gig last year. However i received an interesting birthday present this morning - a true monument of pop culture: a 8 black ball with have magic powers, and which can (apparently) read my future.

After a turned it upside down for a couple of seconds this morning, it said my birthday was going to be good.

(You are) a series of tubes

I truly miss (personal) blogging.

Hopefully will be able to start again in a few weeks, with a new computer. I cannot wait to resume my online activities (non work related) and get active in every online projects I left when I moved to London.

I also really want another template but would have to learn how to make goodlooking blogs, and it certainly is not exactly my forte. I am pumped about all those cool web2.0 applications I did not have the time to use with a personal account, and god - how weird does it feel to realise that you truly miss talking to friends, most of which are only to be found on the blogosphere or Network(ing) sites these days?

I did not realise how dependent I was to Networking sites and blogs up until now - when I foudn myself being Internet-less in my free time. Then again a simple geographical explanation would be sufficient, all my friends live abroad (France, Canada, China, Spain, you name it). And that's an uncomfortable situation to be in when you can't communicate with them as often as you'd like - but then again I should be used to it by now.

In other news, in our new place you can climb on the roof and see a great part of London (the City, mainly). It's absolutely amazing; and I will gladly take pictures soon.

Boris, this week end I wish I was you...

I'm off to Brussels for the week end. Ugh, now I wish I could remember my European Institutions class' content from my 1st year at University...

For those interested, Ryan Adams was extremely good live last weekend. A melancholic (and sick with a vicious cold) version of a country-ish Kurt Cobain.

Patrick Wolf was equally good : cute, fairylike and uplifting. While some hated him, M. liked him a lot, and I am a fan - amongst an ocean of emo 16 years old....

Aurelie: si tu lis mon blog....

Aurelie, one of my best friend, co-creator of Volte Face*, intrepid reporter and fabulous feminist is off to China (Nankin) for 10 months with her boyfriend. Aurelie, I'll miss you dearly, and more than everything I will miss our passionate discussions, your enthusiasm and watching you kicking Remi's ass while debating the (non) merits of capitalism.

Boris and I (and maybe M?) will see you in China for New Year, as promised back in the Kenland pub in Rennes a couple of months ago (1)....

You've been an true inspiration to me this year, a source of wisdom, calm and courage (2), even if Boris and I still hate your organic fairly traded tea/chocolate/tee-shirts/furniture/bread/vegetables/everything.

*Don't bother looking at the blog, the internet content sucked. But our paper-based kick ass zine was brilliant, and we passed it on to activists as we all left town for good this summer.

(1) Well, let's just say I'm 60% sure it will happen, because you know I'm afraid I'll get lost in Shangai and I don't think Boris will be any good at finding directions.

(2) It sounds bad and painfully unoriginal, but it's true.

Some lost words said on the beach.

[...] thats okay, all english speaking people are like that, their brains are secretly like OMIGOD THERE'S ANOTHER LANGUAGE TOO? THEY HAVE WORDS TOO? OMG [in an email sent sometimes this year].

I don't really know how to articulate this without coming off as a discussion-traitor, but the best thing about hanging out with someone for long periods of time is this : you are increasingly more self-conscious and realise the impact your person [your words, body, actions] has on the other one but you also gradually let go and not care about such an interpersonal force/power* anymore.

The dialogue was coming out of nowhere - my intention was solely to fish for lost details or shared impressions.

"What was your favourite part of the week end so far?"

"Watching you I think"

"Doing what?"

"I don't know... Talk to people, move, all those things"

While such a comment would usually be welcomed with a forced-creeped out smile and hordes of negative comments if uttered by a stranger, it was welcolmed by an intrigued and genuinely amused smile when uttered by him.

[Meaning if he is watching and I'm conscious of the process, fear linked to his capacity of judgement progressively falls into oblivion since I am happy with the conclusion he might reach, no matter what it can be.]

* Whether the force is a life sucking, dark or light and uplifting one has yet to be decided. Surely it is both, which makes things even more interesting.

And there goes the metaphor....

"Comprendra qui voudra"...

Blog sabatical

Given that my laptop has been savagely stolen (London is a zoo! Fucking thief! Fucking hell I WILL FIND YOU! THREE YEARS OF ACADEMIC DISSERTATIONS! And 1000 pictures! GONE!) and that I won't blog at work, I think I'll re-enter the blogosphere once I own an I-book.

Soon enough, but not RIGHT now. Feel my pain - Jessica laptopless = hysterical Jessica.

Another feminist rant or what?

If something will ever push me to not have babies, this might be it. Women as babymakingmachines ?

"New federal guidelines ask all females capable of conceiving a baby to treat themselves—and to be treated by the health-care system—as pre-pregnant, regardless of whether they plan to get pregnant anytime soon," reports the Washington Post. "[T]his means all women between first menstrual period and menopause should take folic acid supplements, refrain from smoking, maintain a healthy weight and keep chronic conditions such as asthma and diabetes under control... [I]t's important that women follow this advice throughout their reproductive lives, because about half of pregnancies are unplanned and so much damage can be done to a fetus between conception and the time the pregnancy is confirmed."

Bush is starting a war supporting his own heterowhitenormative values.

Surprising?

Nope.

My point is that while a lot of Americans seem to think Bush is only attacking homosexuality (which he is, with his wish to change the constitution, etc), he's also pushing his conservative agenda on women in general, queer, bi, pansexual, straight or not.... His disguised attacks on homosexuals push straight politically-center-right-but-socially-conservative voters/women/wifes to agree with him.

However while they think this new dynamics will never directly touch them, these new laws will. There's been a shift from a never ending fight gainats abortion to a fight against contraception as well, and the 'contraception mentality' which is seen by Republicans as the core element separating sex and 'family values' - an element that is therefore not desireable and to be eliminated. I.e, for them contraception is a form of abortion too. So yes indeed, as you said, women are babymaking machines in their eyes, either that or we shouldn't have sex if it's for non reproductive purposes (even if you're already married with kids... 'We are opposed to sex before marriage and contraception within marriage' says one catholic activist... I think they long for women having 10+ children again, how feudal is it?).

Openly gay columnist Dan Savage has been trying to underline in his latest columns. He says:

"I've been running around with my hair on fire trying to convince my straight readers that religious conservatives don't just hate homos. Their attacks on gay people, relationships, parents, and sex get all the press, but the American Taliban has an anti-straight-rights agenda too. As I wrote on March 23: "The GOP's message to straight Americans: If you have sex, we want it to fuck up your lives as much as possible. No birth control, no emergency contraception, no abortion services, no lifesaving vaccines. If you get pregnant, tough shit. You're going to have those babies, ladies, and you're going to make those child-support payments, gentlemen."

The piece refering to the GOP's new federal guidelines is linked to this one, published as a cover story by the New York Times last May. The piece is absolutely fantastic imho, and it's a shame not too many papers are publishing about ongoing laws like these, which are being drafted in the shadow.

Even more worrying was an article recently published by Cosmo US (!!!) explaining how conservative lobbies pay scientists and laboratories to come up with highly biased results which are then posted on governmental, official websites (they gave the example of an official gvtal website for Health in Virginia, which insinuated that getting an abortion could lead to breast cancer, or that condoms were not, after all, that effective against STDs).

'Important international health experts say the Bush administration has used the government's program for AIDS relief to transmit its abstinence message overseas, de-emphasizing condoms and jeopardizing the health of large numbers of people, especially in Africa.'

The point of all this I think is to underline that the 'war against homosexuality' is part of a vast liberticide conservative agenda, which is way more important and intrusive than what straight people usually imagine it to be.

The unbearable lightness of being happy.

Well nobody seemed to enjoy my binary coded update. I became somehow fed up with the blogosphere in the past weeks seeing that:

- I wrote 100 pages about it in 3 weeks and it's enough to overdose on anything 'wired'*

- I don't have Internet @ home** for now

- I am paid to deal with forums and blogs all day long

- London's e-cafes usually make me want to cry

- I have a life (...I know!!! How silly it is to always realise that your internet consumption decrease as your life and activities increase? Makes me ponder on the content of the past 5 years of my life, really...)

* Makes me think, last week my husband stated that Wired was 'so 90's' and kind of passe. I begged to differ, even if I do realise that Wired's hours of glory were circa 1995 when Coupland wrote pieces for them.

** Houseshare in an IKEA-ish (...) flat in a very cool aera of East London, with two Italians and one New Zealander. I hate IKEA, but I love the flat.

I had a weird conversation with Mohammed on Friday night, in which I tried to explain something that never happened to me before. I am, as for right now, quite contempt and happy with my life. While years and years of living in France were spent trying to forge a plan to escape the country forever, now I actually done it and secured a place to live and a job and well, a new life in less than a couple of weeks, I don't really feel to need to run away.

Yet.

Mohammed, being the eternal optimist, underlined that happiness was very realtive and such a state of mind does not last. I said well, it's reassuring.

And I meant it. Being contempt sends brains into a lethargic state which provoke laziness.

That said, being depressed does just the same thing.

----------------------

This is something I wrote to someone when I came back from Canada to France last June. A year ago already. Those periods of transition between countries are always eerie and just plain Bizzare.

"When I last talked to you I was standing in the boarding aera of Montreal's airport; trying to use all my 25 cents change phoning you before leaving the country. The flight was uneventful, we did not sleep, and watched Ocean's 12; which is bad but you are right, good fashion designers were hired.

Upon our arrival Boris and I were both drunk (both with the free gin tonic Air Canada gave us, and truly what was exhaustion). It's funny how true it is that french people are mean compared to people from Quebec, who are always smiling and helpful. My first contact with France was the policeman asking for my passport; which he violently grabbed from my hand without even a 'Bonjour', looking at me suspiciously. Same happened for Boris, but it got us lauughing; that's how people are in France: they don't give a fuck about being fakely polite...but quite franky it is ridiculous most of the times.

We then spent a good hour trying to pick up our suitcases. You have to understand the Charles de Gaulle airport in Paris is probably the less organized one in the world; it is huge and round (!!), which makes it extremely difficult to find your way inside. So after fighting with two or three bitchy people, and after being disgusted at the sight of topless Quebecois fat hairy men changing their t-shirt in front of everyone (it is my understanding that french people are too conservative when it comes to this kind of things, while Americans don't have complexes, see obese girls in mini skirts just because they can, that would never happen in France), we finally found our way out and chain-smoked (Players light for me... I still have a part of Canada with me this way, and smile everytime i light one).

When i finally arrived home it was a bit too much for me. It is all too depressing, coming back to a city like this one after living with close to 2 million of people in Vancouver. Everything feels like i left last week. What hurts the most I think is being able to move automatically in the house, find my way without thinking. Even after 9 months abroad, I have this instinctive way of doing things around the house, like turning the TV on or sitting on the same sofa or how to start the microwave.

It reminds me of a silent yet deafeaning routine I thought I'd escape for good going to Vancouver and leaving France, and it's killing me. So many little details I can't cope with here, the news with the same old showmen, and the same weathermen on tv, and the ads, the newspapers in french everywhere, the way signs on the road are different then they are in Canada, everything seems to underline the fact that I liked life there better because I somehow fitted.

(...) Me, coming back here makes me more determined to leave again, everything around me is devilishly screaming 'Jessica you don't belong there'. I am just really glad I am off to London now, because if I had stayed here, at home; for the whole summer, I don't doubt I would be the most unhappy person on earth. London will save me for the summer at least."

Ahhh, and one year later I find myself in London again, this time for more than two months, and this time definitely, infinitely more happy than I was a year ago.

Update: I <3 London, Microserfs reference, Binary code.

As an update, well there's too much to say really but ths sums up the beginning of a lovely story that had been evolving in the shadows for a while now...


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